So today was the first day since I entered Kindergarten that I did not go to school. It was weird waking up this morning, going to work and hearing the customers share stories about how they dropped their son/daughter off for the first day of kindergarten, 5th grade, high school. Honestly, my heart sank a little. I am not sure how to function without it.
I stopped by East this afternoon to see jane. My heart sank some more. I am not sure if I should have done that. I love jane. I loved seeing her face light up when she saw me. I loved seeing Anna and hearing her vent. (I think that was 80% of my job at East. Hearing others frustrations.) I think by stopping by my heart hurts more.
I want to be in the halls at East. I want to hear the "big guy" call me into his office to vent. I want to dial 5103 and hear a familiar voice. I want to be wanted. jane and Anna talked about how much they miss me already. It felt good to be missed, but I want to be needed...somewhere! Anna talked about one of her students with a visual impairment and how they are having a hard time finding help. I want to help! jane talked about the copier breaking. I know how to fix it.
Over the past week I have been really trying to find out who God made me to be. Where are my gifts? What do I like to do? What comes easy? I took a spiritual gift test this week and found out my top 3 gifts are...
1) Administration
2) Intercessory Prayer
3) a tie between Service/Gifts and Mercy
What do you think? Does this fit me? I think so. I have found so much fulfilment in organizing the prayer group for the Busschers. I find it fun, sitting down and figuring out how many tents and drivers we need for Mosaic's fall retreat. How do I take my 3 or 4 gifts and find a job that brings me a feeling of making a difference? How do I not just simply exist in this world?
Sorry about the long rambling posts. If you have any words of wisdom, please let me know.
PS. Even though I didn't go to school today, I still had dreams about the first day of school last night. And kept waking up thinking I was going to over sleep. I also got a new pair of shoes this week too. I am just a creature of habit.
Lydia's DTS Outreach Preformance
1 week ago
1 comment:
Terp,
I think those gifts suit you perfectly! God has you just where you are for a reason! It is hard to 'relax' in where He wants you but if you don't you might miss out on the reason HE has you there! Don't miss out! :) You are beautifully and wonderfully made! Thanks for being you!
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